Posts

Dealing With Stress, Step 5: Clinical Mode On

(This article is a part of a series; please start here)

Observing dispassionately allows control. Once you managed to take the previous step (dis-identifying Yourself from Mind) – or even at the same time – start observing yourself as you would an item in a museum.

Start by observing what happens inside your body. It is easier with the body, because it doesn’t play the identification trick. Scan your muscles, your gut, your heart, your face. Notice the tension in your arms and legs, notice the feeling of a solid rock in your belly, notice the fast-paced, shallow breathing, notice the sensation of heat in your cheeks.

Once you noticed those sensations, stop. Don’t take it further, don’t judge “I shouldn’t feel that, I shouldn’t be red-faced”. Just take the information in and file it without tagging it “good” or “bad”. Go back to scanning and do it as many times as you need to cool off.

After you get familiar with observing your body, you can take the next step and do the same with your mind. Observe what feelings it puts out. Name them as exactly as you can: “my mind is making me feel ashamed“, “my mind is making me feel furious“. It is good information. It is not something you should believe or act upon. If you can trace the source you’re even better off: “my mind makes me feel ashamed I made a mistake because in the first grade the teacher always made crude fun of me because I wasn’t talented at math“. Seeing the source is valuable, because it shows you that your mood has less to do with Now and more to do with The Past. The link is emotional, not rational.

If you have ever been in a negotiation with an used-cars salesman (or any slick, fast-talking sales guy), you know how you look at him working his number, recognize the tricks in his book and smile inwardly “You won’t catch me this time, dude!

The same goes with your mind. It won’t catch you again, because you will recognize its trick, see right through them and take appropriate action, as opposed to the hasty things It wants you to do.

“Response” is the name of the game. “Reaction” is a thing of the past.

Continue with steps 6 and 7 by clicking here
B_txt_14

 

 

 

 

By Catalin Octavian Blaga – Trainer Great People Inside

Trainer who turns business experience and psychology into impacting training programs… and more!  You can find out more about Catalin by clicking here

Dealing With Stress, Step 4: You Are Not Your Mood

(This article is a part of a series; please start here)

Your Mind and You are two different things. Any other part of your body hurting, you would say “my body part is hurting”. It is only with the mind that you say “I am hurting”.

Have you ever been overwhelmed by a feeling of dread, only to scan the near future and find nothing to explain that? It happens to me in the morning, usually. This is one of the many tricks in the mind’s arsenal. What happens is we surrender to the mood without questioning its validity.

But a bad mood is just that: a transient state of the mind. Brains have a way of taking over that other organs don’t. You just have to identify that for what it is: a state of one organ. Important, powerful, useful, but an organ nonetheless.

You can start by dis-identifying Yourself from Mind. Instead of simply surrendering and saying “I am anxious / furious / stressed out” switch to naming your feeling: “I feel anxiety / fury / stress“. This trick helps putting some distance between The Whole You and whatever happens inside.

Next, start calling out the perpetrator: “My mind is making me feel anxiety / fury / stress“. If you can, take a step back mentally and “see” your mind playing its little tricks.

Stop identifying yourself with the workings of your mind. Take a step back. Cool down. It is the most direct way of replacing reaction with response.

Read part 5

 

B_txt_14

B_txt_10

 

 

 

By Catalin Octavian Blaga – Trainer Great People Inside

Trainer who turns business experience and psychology into impacting training programs… and more!  You can find out more about Catalin by clicking here

Great People Inside Conference: The New World of Work – 12,13 October Brasov, Romania

Registration for the Great People Inside Conference: “The New World of Work” has started!

The event taking place between 12th and 13th October 2016, at Kronwell Hotel, Brasov, Romania,  is an unique concept bringing together business representatives, entrepreneurs, managers, specialists and researchers in the field of human resources from all industries, psychologists, representatives of central and local authorities, large consulting companies, as well as internationally renowned experts from the United States of America, Denmark, Israel, Norway, Ireland, Italy, Spain, United Arab Emirates.

“The New World of Work” conference will generate exciting and challenging discussions on the changing nature of work, providing at the same time, practical strategies and insights about how these challenges can be harnessed as opportunities for innovation and development.

Event Partners: Polipol, Contempo Cars, Romanian Software, Tuborg, EximBank, ICF România, Wellington,  AON, BestSmart Consulting, Benefit, Oracle, Hațegan Attorneys, Exelo, Kirchhoff Automotive, MaxRelax, UP Romania, HTI Romania, PP Romania, AHK, Wine in Business.

Supported by: Steaua CSM EximBank, Daiana Stoicescu & YouAreMore.

Media Partners: Realitatea TV, KISS FM, Mix TV, Mix 2 TV, Revista Cariere, HR Manager, 4Career, Learn&Go, Stirea Zilei.com, Detectiveconomic.ro, Biztop.ro, Revista Metropola, Prețul Zilei, myTEX, Brașovultau.ro, Monitorul Expres, Radio Brașov, Jurnalul de Maine. 

For more details, you can access the website dedicated to the event here.

 

screenshot.316